Atychiphobia (n.) fear of failure; fear of not being good enough. 

Since starting Amelia McLeod Photography I have had many ups and downs, highs and lows. I have been filled with intense belief in myself with never ending drive to learn about online marketing, websites and social media involvement.  But that is not what I wanted to talk about.

Easter is upon us once again!  For some it is a time for family, for some a religious experience and for and others it just means a four day weekend, Ho rah!  For me this year it is the holiday I am looking forward to, a time to recollect myself and allow myself to indulge in some of my favourite vices: chocolate, bubble baths, a good glass of wine and beauty treatments. 

Drinking wine - easter egg - bubble bath - cucumber on the eyes

I have started this new journey in my life, wanting to use my creativity again, wanting to help others see the beauty in themselves and to create amazing memories through imagery.   But of course, I have fears about failure, and the best way I can do that is by giving you a quote I have recently found:

Let me list for you some of the many ways in which you might be afraid to live a more creative life: You’re afraid you have not talent. You’re afraid you’ll be rejected or citicized or ridiculed or misunderstood or - worst of all - ignored. You’re afraid there’s no market for your creativity, and therefore no point in pursuing it. You’re afraid somebody else already did it better. You’re afraid everybody else already did it better. You’re afraid somebody will steal your ideas, so it’s safer to keep them hidden forever in the dark. You’re afraid you won’t be taken seriously. You’re afraid your work isn’t politically, emotionally or artistically improtant enough to change anyone’s life. You’re afraid your dreams are embarassing. You’re afraid that someday you’ll look back on your creative endeavors as having been a giant waste of time, effort, and money. You’re afraid your don’t have the right kind of discipline. You’re afraid you don’t have the right kind of work space, or financial freedom, or empty hours in which to focus on invention or exploration. Your’re afraid you don’t have the right kind of training or degree. You’re afraid you’re too fat (I don’t known what this has to do with creativity,exactly, but experience has taught me that most of us are afraid we’re too fat, so let’s just put that on the anxiety list, for good measure). You’re afraid of being exposed as a hack, or a fool, or a dilettante, or a narcissist. You’re afraid of upsetting your family with what you may reveal. You’re afraid of what your peers and coworkers will say if you express your personal truth aloud. You’re afraid of unleashing your innermost demons, and you really don’t want to encounter your innermost demons. You’re afraid your best work is behind you. You’re afraid you never had any best work to begin with. You’re afraid you neglected your creativity for so long that now you can never get it back. You’re afraid you’re too old to start. You’re afraid you are too young to start. You’re afraid because something went well in your life once, so obviously nothing can ever go well again. You’re afraid because nothing has ever gone well in your life, so why bother trying? You’re afraid of being a one-hit wonder. You’re afraid of being a no-hit wonder.
— Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear'

We are all afraid of so much in life, for you it may be not finding the right person to share your life with, not succeeding in your chosen career, not pleasing your friends and family, or not liking any photo taken of you (I will address this in a future post).  But the truth is, we should not let our fears cripple us, or hold us back...

If I fail I will pick myself up again and try again, try harder, try differently and then try again.  If I don't fail I will never learn, I will never grow and I will never expand my world.  So, in this holiday time I want to challenge you - do something that you are afraid of.  Draw a picture, ask someone out (did you know that this is how I started dating my husband), jump out of a plane if that is what sets your heart racing.  I would love to know that it is that you are afraid of, comment below, and more than anything I would love to know how you have beaten that fear.

Stay safe in this holiday period, may your travels be exciting, and I will leave you with one more inspirational thought (cause let's face it, we all read them, whether we admit it or not):

Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says, ‘I’ll try again tomorrow.’
— Mary Anne Radmacher,

Love out, Amelia xo